The middle…

Faith
includes
noticing
the mess,
The emptiness
and discomfort
and letting it
be there
Until some
Light returns

– Ann Lamott

These words speak to a reality in my life these days. Life has shifted in new and uncomfortable ways. We are in the middle, deep in the dark place, before the turn. We left one certainty and have not yet reached the other side. In my favorite books, this is where the hero takes heart and stands firm in the face of insurmountable odds… and presses on to victory. Continue reading “The middle…”

Beautiful mess…

Not long ago, life took some unexpected turns that have had us hustling and running to catch up. We’ve spent time in hospital waiting rooms and stale cafeterias. We’ve shown up for a variety of tests, both invasive and benign. At the end of the testing we faced the verdict, which brought relief and a wait for a fix. We’ve prayed together and alone, we’ve updated everyone who cares, and we’ve had impossible conversations about what happens if the worst happens. I watched them wheel this man I adore past the swinging doors. That hour lasted a lifetime. When the procedure was done, they released us back into our lives. Continue reading “Beautiful mess…”

Christmas pondering…

This year our family has grown from five humans to seven (with one still on the way). We couldn’t be happier to welcome these two “others” who have captured our children’s hearts and our as well. We’ve been getting to know each other and are finding our stride as a family of seven (almost 8). Relationships are stronger and gatherings are much more fun. Not perfect, but great fun. Continue reading “Christmas pondering…”

Cleaning days…

I’ve been cleaning drawers, closets, clutter, my floors. I’m preparing for a new season, for the tree, decorations, family, and lots of little white lights, but before I do the next big thing, I need to clear some space. I love the smell of freshly washed floors, the way the windows seem wider when they are newly clean. I love touching and fluffing and putting things in their places. I adore throwing away bags of trash.

Continue reading “Cleaning days…”

Anticipation…

As she carried our tray toward the table at lunch today, I couldn’t help but smile. She has softened over the past few months. Her belly lead the way as she moved through the crowded restaurant. Her pink sweatshirt looked particularly sweet today. She’s radiant as a mom to be. Her world is about to be rocked by my grandson. She’s starting to have contractions, the baby has dropped, time is getting near. Continue reading “Anticipation…”

We the people…

By all accounts, this political season has been brutal. As I prepare to cast my ballot this morning, I am less concerned with tonight’s results than I am with tomorrow’s response. My Facebook feed is filled with harsh images, doomsday language, and vitriol from both sides. It seems we’ve stopped supporting our individual candidates (maybe because they are both so flawed) and instead taken to villanize the other. Continue reading “We the people…”

Living well…

For far too much of my life, I’ve been pulled along by the needs and expectations of others. In this season, I want to be propelled by my own values and intention. I’ve spent so much of my life responding to the needs or wants of others, I feared I had lost my own inner compass. Continue reading “Living well…”

An adventure…

Sometimes I need a friend that will take me on the road. After weeks of pressure and stress, the excitement of the baby shower, and months of turmoil and change I needed a day away. My friend texted me on Friday and let me know that as the Cruise Director, she had scheduled a day away. Would I be interested? Of course I was. Continue reading “An adventure…”