Minding the silence…
I love words. When I get overwhelmed, you can often find me on my way to the book store. The weight of pages, the smell, and the hush sooths my soul. I am a talker. I process my world through an almost constant deluge of words. I think out loud examining my life, my experience, my relationships, and my world through words both penned and aired. If you think I have a lot to say, you should hear the words that swirl around inside my head that never even see the light of day.
Sometimes, I find that I need a break.
Maybe you too, need a break from words. Imagine sinking into silence, leaving your phone behind, ignoring your to do list, and leaving the books unopened. Our souls need silence, stretches of it, to recalibrate around something else. Something other than words.
We need to engage our other senses, to quiet the heart and mind. Maybe it is in the knit and purl, knit and purl as the wool slides through your fingers. Or it could be, the need to fold and tuck your things back in to place. We need to allow the silence to smooth away our worries, to unwind our swirling thoughts. We need to be reminded that we do not hold the universe together, and let things go.
In the swirl of my everyday life, words and noise press in on me, but in the silence, I can feel myself expand, relax. It’s like when you take off your shoes (or bra) at the end of the day. Rest and relief.
I do not come to silence easily. My house (and my head) have always been filled with sound. From the stereo speakers, the constant television, and now the internet, words have flooded my life from every direction. It is only recently that I realized there might be other options.
The problem is that I don’t always know what to do with myself when the words stop swirling. To me, it feels like whirling disorientation. Like stepping off a boat and feeling the ground move, I have a sense that the echo of the noise remains. I feel unsteady and vulnerable. It’s like the words have wrapped around me, covering me in some way. I am learning to stay in this uncomfortable
- To simply sit and notice
- To walk and feel the sting of the air on my face
- To sip quietly and enjoy
- To rest in the empty
Silence alone won’t heal the soul, we need to hush the worries too. Sometimes, the words swirl around inside my head with a force that must be attended to. External quiet won’t always calm this storm, but it is a start.
We must learn again to breathe in and breathe out. We can chase the thoughts around and around in the quiet, and find no relief, or learn to still the soul and let the silence enter.
Breathe it all in, and love it all out.
-Mary Oliver
