Rain dripped off the eaves as we peered out the window on Sunday morning. The forecast called for a little light rain in the morning. We were confident it would clear, in spite of the blowing trees, leaves, and sideways rain. When you plan a wedding outside, you plan for contingencies… the tents were in place, the food tables under cover, and we were still hoping to see the rain stop. Nothing was going to get in the way of this special day. Continue reading “Adding to the family…”
I thought marriage would bring me happiness. Isn’t that what the movies teach us? “You complete me!” Instead, marriage has been the training ground for an other-ness I didn’t really understand. I wanted to be loved, seen, cared for, and protected. I wanted a partner to do life with. I wanted someone to meet my needs. When I met that dark-eyed boy/man, he felt like home. He seemed to be able to “handle life.” He took care of things, and he wanted to be with me. Continue reading “Making love last…”
I worry like it’s my job. I gnaw on a concern until it’s lost all of its taste. In fact, I feel like it’s irresponsible not to worry about things that matter… Like I don’t care if I don’t worry. Often, in my head, worry shows my commitment to people, to projects, or to plans. The thing is, worry doesn’t actually produce any good things in my life. Continue reading “Be anxious for nothing…”
She sends Facebook notes and messages. Today it was a poem. The words take my breath away. She knows. It is a tender thing, to be seen. It is especially tender to be seen, through your words. I am grateful. Continue reading “The real deal…”
I love a new planner. This year, I got two. I bought one for 50% off in October in preparation for the New Year. Unfortunately, Zoe ate it. So, I’ve spent hours searching out just the right replacement. It should be here on Wednesday. Continue reading “Planning for life…”
Over the past few weeks, our family has spent too much time close to the veil that separates life and death. Most of the time we live as though our lives will be like this forever, as though life will never end. Times like this remind us that no one gets out alive. Continue reading “Time close to the veil…”
Showing up takes courage. It is much safer to sit behind the barricade and watch life go by. I long to live safely, it is among my greatest values. Except I also long to be known, to be understood, to be loved. I believe everyone else does as well. Continue reading “The courage to care…”
I am blessed. I live an extraordinary life filled with amazing people, a loving (if crazy) family, meaningful work, and abundance on every side. This life is overflowing with blessing and love, and yet, I find myself collapsed in a heap, overwhelmed, and overloaded. Continue reading “A report from the screaming edge…”
Jenny Allen is re-releasing her book Anything: The prayer that unlocked my God and my Soul (now with a Bible study).
Here is my Anything story:
I stood crying in front of the phone. My toddler, kindergartner, and 2nd grader played quietly in the living room as I reached out my hand to make the call. When I dialed the number, a friendly voice asked how she could help me, and I told her I would have to drop my classes and quit school. She took my name, said she was sorry, and then goodbye. As I hung the phone back on the cradle, I looked to Heaven for help. Continue reading “My Anything story…”
Last week I enjoyed the community of women. We gathered around a meal and shared our lives, our joys, our struggles. We talked, we ate, and we opened our lives to one another. There is a special magic that happens when women come together intent on building community.
Community is built with courage and intention. We don’t come together without fear and frustrations. We know the cost of sharing our lives, but we have determined that the value of community outweighs the cost. Not one of us comes to the table without knowing the vulnerability inherent in the sharing. We know, because we have paid the price… hearts bruised and broken by sharp words, judgement, criticism, and failure. Each of us both givers and receivers of the lashes… and yet we gather. Continue reading “When we gather…”